Friday, 20 February 2009

Night shift post....

Not alot happening tonight so I thought I'd do a quick post.

Not a fat lot happening on the poker this week. Probably done about £50 on MTT's without getting close but my chest has cleared up and I'm feeling alot better.

One of the things about working shifts is that you get a fair few days off in the week and I have become hooked on Homes Under The Hammer over the past few months (where they see how much different properties go for at auction and what the new owners do to them before selling or renting the property out and what profit was in it).

It has got to the stage where tbh I want to have a go at it. Given that you are getting jack shit on any savings and there are some bargains to be had, even though house prices have probably not got as low as they will yet, it seems like there could be a few quid to be made.I have worked out how the financing works on auction properties and that you remortgage once the work is completed and though I wouldn't be interested in anything major regarding refurbishments, a lick of paint, new kitchen and bathroom (potentially having to move the bathroom upstairs) etc seems the way forward with a terraced house etc.

One slight snag with my master plan is that I don't come from a building background so fitting a kitchen and bathroom could be tad difficult especially when I have to google how to change a fookin light bulb. However with mates in different trades I am planning to get a couple of them to put a few bob and their expertise in to see whether it can be done. Going out with a few of them next weekend for an all dayer so I reckon I should have a 10 minute window to sell the idea before the first shots go down and everything goes to rat shit.

There are probably still a shed load of things I need to consider but I went to see a terraced house yesterday which an old dear had had which has a guide price of £35-£40k and have searched the prices of houses sold on the same road and they were going for £90k 12 months ago. Even with the downturn they won't have lost 50% so even if things don't happen straight away I reckon the idea itself has its merits.

Oh well just thought I'd post it to look back on in 6 months and see whether I have got my finger out my arse for a change.

GL all

Joke -

Whats the difference between woman and a condom............
Fuck all.. When they're not on your cock they're in your wallet.

Shit but the best I've got.

Friday, 13 February 2009

Another little un.....

3rd small MTT win of the year and its the 3rd £2 MTT that started at 8pm. This is the time I start playing most nights as my Son goes to bed at 8pm. Still not had a fag but have got a chest infection so even if I was still smoking I wouldn't want one anyways. I have coughed that much my chest feels like its been kicked by a horse and the cough medicine mixed with the cough sweets has given me the wind something terrible/terrific (Depending on whether you are the Wife or me). One problem though with having terrible wind and a chest infection is that it has to be said, occasionally, you are hoping that that last one was just wind with nothing thrown out as well. Hope you are also having some luck on the virtual or real felt..


Joke -

Bought myself a new deodorant today. Instructions said "Take off top and push up bottom" Still in casualty at the moment but my farts smell nice.

Tuesday, 10 February 2009

Giving up smoking......

Having read UKgatsby that he has given up smoking I thought I would log my experiences in trying to do this. I have currently not had a fag for 4 weeks and atm it is going easily as I paid the Dr the prescription charge and he is giving me a weekly pack of patches for 8 weeks. Have been for the odd pint which has been the hardest bit but other than that with the snow the past week or so I have had a laugh at the others who have been dithering in the shed at work.

I do hope this works but having given up for 18 months a few years ago only to start again during the last World Cup I know that I can't afford to have even 1 more smoke or I'll be off again and when you hit the big 40 whether you mean to or not you do think what you can do to maximise your time on the mortal coil.

When I gave up for the 18 months I went with a mate to a hypnotherapist and even though he did not put me under, for the reasons given below, the images he described were very graphic so I gave up anyway.
When we went to the hypnotherapist I went in first and he started talking about the known health hazards of smoking and then the impact that it has on your nearest and dearest. Tbh it shit me up to think about the potential outcomes. He then said he was going to relax every muscle in my body while he transferred these thoughts into my mind. The only problem was I was dying for a piss and thought to myself "If I relax every muscle in my body it's going to get a bit messy!!" He had already started so I closed my eyes as he had asked and just waited for it to end. He knew I had not been under as my eyeballs were moving around under my eyelids as I was thinking about different stuff. Didn't matter though as the images were enough to put me off. Before my mate went in I had considered trying to bribe the hypnotherapist to get my mate to have a wank every time he wanted a fag. (My mate had said he liked a fag at work and over a pint). I figured it would never happen but funnily enough my mate had called him before the appointment to try and bribe him into making me quack like a duck if I thought about a fag. Would have been the maddest conversation ever the following weekend if we had both bribed him and were trying to work out why our careers were up the Swanee and why my mate was having to sign a register each week.

Oh well that's it. Bugger all happening poker wise and back on nights tonight so will probably just play a 2 quidder MTT as I can work at the same time.

Joke -

One day a long time ago in a land far far away lived a woman who did not whine, nag or bitch. But it was just one day and a fucking long time ago.

Friday, 6 February 2009

2nd win of the year (a bigger one will come).....

Happy enough to have another win, though as with the first it is just a tiddler. Trying to use the correct bankroll management is a pain but providing the roll keeps going in the right direction then I might be able to start posting better (larger £$£$) results.

Used my previous posting (01/02/09) small stakes MTT rules in this and went from 1500 to 4500 chips in the first 4 hands when AKos and JJ held up against different opposition and then to total obscurity for over an hour when I did not get any sort of hand, only to have a bit of luck when 19th of 20 and then it was relatively plain sailing. The main aim of the rule is to stop wasting time as much as anything.

On a different subject but still gambling related is something I spotted on raisetheriver which is matched betting. The link it refers to is ... l?t=577362 I need to read into this in alot more detail but tbh the general idea is that you can take advantage of bookie firms free bets to basically get free money by laying the same bet on betfair. This has got to be better than grinding for hours on end :). Anyways I am not endorsing this but it is defo of interest to me so I thought it might be to you.

GL all .. Gav


A ship sinks with only 3 survivors; Darren, David and Daisy. They swim to a small island and live there for a couple of years doing what comes naturally. But Daisy feels so bad about having sex with both of them she kills herself. The boys are sad but they get over it and, again, nature takes its course. After a few more months the lads feel really bad about what they are doing......................

So they bury her....


Tuesday, 3 February 2009

Losing again....but this time its a snowball fight...

On nights this week so it could be viewed as a slight ball ache when you get a text from your lads school asking you to pick him up at 1.30 because of the snow and then close the school for the following day. However due to the fact that there is nothing I can do about it and can grab a couple of hours sleep at work anyway my lad and I made the most of the snow yesterday. It started by trying to build a snowman but after shovelling the snow into a pile in the front garden it was just a 3 ft pile and he had already buggered off to throw snowballs with a couple of other kids that live on our grove. Then one of the little gits threw one at me and it then went a bit mad for an hour. The other kids said it should be them vs me and Cam who, not as quietly as he would have liked, whispered that he would pretend to be on my side but help them get me???(so much for family fookin loyalty lol).
So at this point it was 3 v 1 and they had it well organised with making loads of snowballs and storing them but I had my nice fresh 3 ft pile of crappy snowman. Then another lad turned up and joined them. Now in my day if you wanted a game you would ask which side to go on but he just smacked me with a snowball to the side of the head and it appears the decision was made.
However I had my fun too with them being so busy yapping about what their game plan was they didn't notice me creeping (40 year old commando style) to pelt the crap out of them and get some self respect back.
After an hour I made my excuses regarding running a bath and doing the tea and left them to it.
I felt like a kid again at the time but now feel about 50 as I am aching from the umpteen snowballs I took, the half dozen muppety fall overs and aforementioned commando tactics.
Working again tonight and he has just asked if we can do snowballs and sledging again today. F'in marvellous but might as well make the most of it as this is the most snow we've had since I was a kid.

Good luck all


Joke -

Bloke holds a party where each guest has to come dressed as an emotion. 1st guest arrives painted green with "n" and "v" across his chest "I'm green with envy" he says. A woman arrives in a pink body stocking with feathers around her bits. "I'm tickled pink!". Next 2 guests are Irish , one with his dick in a bowl of custard and the other with his nob stuck in a pear. The host is shocked and asks what they have come as. "Well oim fuckin discustard and Mick has come in dispair!!"

Sunday, 1 February 2009

Month End....

Oh well. Posting my footie bet did not bring any change in fortune and once again £20 was turned into scrap paper in 90 minutes.
Overall the poker ended +£140 for the month as, even though I had a few slurps yesterday, I had the sense to drink squash when I got back so still had a slightly winning night.

I need to set myself up with some reminders for when the shit hits the fan, which we all know it will.
I only come up against a couple of fellow bloggers occasionally so it can’t do me too much harm. (I hope)

1) Don’t stick to the 3 x blind raise in the small stakes MTT’s. You can go 10 or more x bb in the early stages and still get a caller or 2 so stop pissing about.
2) Don’t panic if you don’t get the hands you want to play. Be patient and they will come eventually and when they do just get the chips in (see point 1).
3) If you get a decent hand in the first couple of rounds of an MTT people are more likely to call through each street so just get aggressive as people want to double up early and don’t mind taking unnecessary risks.
4) When you get to a FT get aggressive as people seem to be looking to ladder and are less inclined to bet (beware of the other aggressive types though unless you have a hand).

gl all


3 men who were captured by savages were told their cocks would be removed in a manner appropriate to their job! 1st man was a lumberjack so his would be chopped off. 2nd man was a butcher so his was to be sliced off. 3rd man started laughing. When the captors asked why he replied "I work in a lollipop factory!!"

Keep smiling