Now normally when one of your kids gets arrested it’s not funny.
However when they have not knowingly done anything wrong and they then make it blindingly obvious they will never make a master criminal anyway it becomes quite funny.
My 15 year old lad was offered and accepted some building work at half term and on his way home from work was arrested for being in a stolen car. He didn’t know it was stolen and I was called in to assist with the interview.
Below is a transcript of sorts:
Mr Plod “Did you discuss the car you were in at all?”
A little later with no further prompts
Callum “I think he bought it cheap though”
Mr Plod “What did he buy cheap?”
Callum “The car”
Mr Plod “How do you know? I thought you hadn’t discussed it”
Callum “Just guessing”
Mr Plod “Does X have any insurance for the car?”
Callum “I’m not sure but I don’t think he’s got a licence” (Who needs friends like that?)
Mr Plod knew I was dying to tell the pillock to shut up and tbh I thought he was going to ask for 50 other offences to be taken into account (for stealing lollipops off his brothers).
He will be on TV on Britains Dumbest Criminals when he tries to rob a bank but forgets to cut the eye holes out of his balaclava.
Told his Mom to ground him but she said she hadn’t done anything wrong so why should she be punished by having to look at his gormless mug all week. Fair enough I suppose.
On to poker and I’m still losing but am playing better (if that’s supposed to be any consolation). Bankroll down to £850 due to the pub singing fooker staying in X-Factor and losing run but still got enough so no worries there.
Joke:- This is totally politically and everything else incorrect so apologies in advance
Shagged a deaf and dumb girl last night but felt so ashamed I broke all her fingers so she couldn’t tell anyone.